


The Touch of a Familiar Stranger

by lifeisloud



Category: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spideychelle - Fandom
Genre: Angst, F/M, PeterMJ - Freeform, Spideychelle, it gets steamy for a sec, there is an alternate ending that hurts, you may cry sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-08
Updated: 2019-11-08
Packaged: 2021-01-25 18:04:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21360439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lifeisloud/pseuds/lifeisloud
Summary: “Peter,” MJ can barely get his name out her mouth, she hasn’t spoken his name in months or even really thought about him since the last time she had seen him, his name used to be the most familiar thing ever and now it felt foreign on her tongue there was another thing that came with his name that pang in her chest.
Relationships: Michelle Jones & Peter Parker, Michelle Jones/Peter Parker
Comments: 3
Kudos: 56





	The Touch of a Familiar Stranger

**Author's Note:**

> I actually don’t hate this so please be kind to me I am sensitive  
Ps there is some steamy parts but it’s not super graphic or anything

Michelle’s eyes flutter open taking in her surroundings, she was in her living room the tv was on casting an ugly blue light into the tiny room, but that wasn’t the first thing she notices. The first thing she notices is the incessant banging on her door well maybe it wasn’t incessant her barely awake brain was processing the sound loudly but it was actually a rather soft sound. She sits up on her couch the blanket she had draped over her falls into her lap she pivots her head towards the kitchen she can see the time on the stove, 3 AM. The knocking is still going on and MJ wonders who in their right mind is knocking on her door at this hour. She tosses the blanket to the side padding over to her door. Stupidly, she doesn’t look through the peephole something tells her she doesn’t need to. She swings the door open and all the air in her lungs is sucked out. 

“Peter,” MJ can barely get his name out her mouth, she hasn’t spoken his name in months or even really thought about him since the last time she had seen him, his name used to be the most familiar thing ever and now it felt foreign on her tongue there was another thing that came with his name that pang in her chest. 

“I-I’m sorry,” Peter stutters his voice cracks as he speaks and MJ feels that familiar dryness in her throat. “I didn’t know where else to go,” He chokes out, MJ swallows thickly biting her lip. She puts herself aside for a second noticing the blood dripping down his cheek coming from a huge gash just above his eyebrow his face was purpling around bumps that she could tell came from someone repeatedly punching him, she notices his hunched frame how he leaned to the side a hand pulled across his body like he was physically trying to hold himself together. She notices his face, pinched up in pain. She takes a moment glancing away because she had forgotten how shocking it was to see him in this state. She takes in a deep breath forcing herself to look back at him. 

“Are you ok?” She questions her voice is low and weak but she wishes it wasn’t. She’d be lying if she had said she hadn’t thought what she might say if she had run into Peter again what she’d say to him or how she would react, freezing up was not one of the things she envisioned doing. 

“Uh,” Peter pauses blinking rapidly, MJ assumes its to keep his tears at bay. “I know you probably don’t want to see me, but I-I needed to see you.” Peter finally admits. 

“You needed to see me or you needed help getting patched up?” MJ asks, her voice is dry emotionless but on the inside, she wants to sob. The very idea of Peter just wanting to see her again was painful but with the very quick realization that he was probably here because he needed patching up without having to fend off questions from an actual doctor stung more than she cared to admit, it kind of felt like she had been slapped. She sighs briefly contemplating slamming the door in his face the thought is fleeting because the more she stares at Peter the more his desperation becomes apparent. MJ glances down the hallway making sure none of her nosy neighbors were coming out to see who she was talking to in the hall at this hour, luckily no-one was around. She steps back a little gesturing for Peter to come into her apartment. She closes and locks the door behind him when she turns around she watches as Peter scans her apartment. “Looking for what’s different.” She comments walking up behind him he startles. 

“It hasn’t really changed that much,” He notes with a weak laugh but he cringes as his laugh dies down. She rolls her eyes at him gently grabbing his shoulder and directing him towards the couch. She helps Peter take a seat on the couch because it looked like every movement and every breath was causing him incredible pain. 

“I’ll be right back,” MJ tells him. She goes to her bathroom searching for the first aid kit. 

A couple of months ago the first aid kit would just sit on Michelle’s bathroom counter for when Peter would come by after his patrols most of the time he never had too serious injuries, just minor cuts, and bruises. But there was always that occasional time he would show up limping or with an eye swollen completely shut. One time he was so badly beaten he couldn’t even  get  to her place, he had had Karen call her and she had to go out to a dark alley to patch him up there just enough so he could get to her place, that was one of the last times she had seen him. She pushes those memories from her head and focuses on the present beat up Peter that was sitting on her living room couch. She finds the kit pushed all the way to the back of the cabinet. She pulls it out and goes back to the living room where she finds Peter staring off into space. 

She puts the first aid kit down on the coffee table in front of Peter. “Hold on I just need to get one more thing.” She tells him she goes over to her work bag opening it and pulling out the item she needed. She walks back over to Peter sitting down on the coffee directly in front of him. His eyes snap up to hers as she sits, she swallows nervously. 

“That’s pretty official.” He points at Michelle’s stethoscope hanging from her neck. She was a year into her residency, you spend most of your nights as a teenager patching up your best friend and then eventual boyfriend and it kind of has an influence on the career path you choose. She laughs dryly as she flips open the kit before turning back to Peter to assess his injuries. 

“Where does it hurt the most?” MJ asks while she waits for him to answer she takes out a pair of gloves pulling them onto her hands. She could do this without them it was just Peter but she was scared to make direct contact with him, terrified that with one touch the flesh memory of him would be too much for her to take. Peter gestures with his chin to his right shoulder, which explains why he was leaning the way he was when she answered the door. MJ leans forward pressing a tentative hand to his shoulder he instantly winces. “I think your shoulder might be out of its socket,” MJ notes she tilts her head up slightly to look up at him. “I’m gonna have to pop it back in, and then your little healing abilities should kick in and repair as normal.” She explains, she leans back a little pausing. “But it’s gonna hurt like a bitch.” She tells him, he looks down at her in pain. 

“Em, it already does.” He replies through gritted teeth. She locks up at the sound of her nickname. He was the only one she ever allowed to call her that and since she hadn’t seen him no one had dared to say it to her. Her breathing hitches for a second before she regains her composure and focuses on the task at hand. 

“Ok, I’m gonna count to three and then pop.” She gets up from the coffee table, she plants one knee right behind him, the couch shifts causing her leg to press into Peter’s back, her other knee comes to rest pressed up against his thigh. She leans back placing her hands on either side of his shoulder he winces as her hands settle. “Ok, one, two, three.” She twists as hard as she can. 

“Son of a bitch.” Peter curses leaning forward out of Michelle’s grip.

“Don’t say I didn’t warn ya.” She chirps shrugging, she removes herself from the couch. She goes back over to the first aid kit. She turns for a second scanning the injuries on the rest of his body. “Now the easy part,” She announces turning back around with bandages and rubbing alcohol. 

“I don’t know from what I remember this bit stings a whole lot.” Peter counters, he eyes the cleaning alcohol in her hand. 

“Dude, you swung here from who knows where with a dislocated shoulder and you’re complaining about rubbing alcohol?” She fires back shaking her head at him. He laughs a little and it isn’t a dry laugh or sad laugh it was a real genuine laugh, and she hadn’t realized how much she had missed that sound. She clears her throat mentally yelling at the little butterflies that had awoken in her stomach. 

“Ok well then do your worst.” His eyes level with her’s and she does her best to keep a smile suppressed. 

“Thank you I will.” She says with a curt nod, she tips the bottle of rubbing alcohol over onto a cotton pad in her hand before putting the bottle down on the coffee table and leaning forward. Peter winces as she touches the pad to the cut above his eyebrow. He flinches the next few times she touches the cleansing pad to his cut but eventually stops. Their faces are so close together and Michelle has a serious fear that he can hear her heart pounding in her ribcage which she knew was physically impossible but it didn’t stop her from worrying. She glances down at Peter’s lips for just a second but its a second she wishes she could take back because when her eyes travel back up to the wound right above Peter’s eyebrow she notices Peter watching her. She decides its best if she pulls back a little, she needed to check the wounds anyway, Peter is still staring at her. 

Michelle had been taking her time because she really didn't want to get to the last bit of Peter’s face that needed attention, his lips. There was a huge gash going over his top lip it wasn’t actively bleeding but she could tell that it had been the blood was dried around the edges of the wound like it had happened a while ago. She pauses for a second contemplating how long ago he would have had to get that specific wound for it to look like that, she lands on a time a little too long for him to wait to have it checked out. MJ pushes the feeling that was beginning to rise in her stomach away forcing herself to focus on Peter’s lip. But her mouth decides to betray her. 

“So why did you wait so long to come here?” Michelle asks she focuses on the cut and definitely not on Peter’s lips. Not his lips. But Michelle’s inquiry startles Peter so much so that he actually jerks away from her. He sputters for a few seconds his mouth opening and closing a few times and Michelle can practically see the wheels turning in his head frantically. 

“How do you know that I-“ MJ holds her hand up stopping the Peter rant she knew was coming. 

“Because I know you,” She looks at him seriously, eyes locking in an all too intense stare down one that makes her heart skip in her chest. “Well that and the very obviously dried blood on your lip,” She tries to make the quip light-hearted but it falls kind of flat and she’s aggravated because as much as she wanted to fall back into old familiar habits she’s just reminded of the awful and horrible pain she felt when everything went to shit for them. As much as she wanted to ignore it there was a ginormous brick wall in between the two of them and she wasn’t about to tear that wall down and subject herself to that kind of pain again. 

“I,” Peter pauses like what he had decided he wanted to say was just not good enough. “I didn’t want to have to see you,” Peter finally spits out and oh my god does it sting. She doesn’t want it to but it does. She does her best to keep the hurt off of her face but she feels like she’s failing. Suddenly there’s a huge boom of thunder from outside and MJ almost falls off the coffee table. But Peter’s right there his hands shoot out to catch her squeezing her upper arms to steady her. She pauses for a second collecting herself she leans back slightly, making Peter’s hands drop from her arms. 

“Didn’t know it was supposed to storm,” Michelle offers casually. She needed to change the subject otherwise she wasn’t getting through the rest of this patching up. 

“Yeah me either,” Peter plays along and she’s never been more grateful. 

As Michelle continues her work the storm gets worse and worse outside but there was another storm brewing but this one was inside her apartment, this one was forming right in between her and Peter, and she had an awful feeling that they were going to drown in it. She kind of wished she had a lift raft prepared. MJ discards the cotton she was using to clean Peter’s wounds and she takes off the gloves she was wearing all the while Peter watches her carefully, she wanted him to look at something else she prayed he’d look at something else. She gets up from the coffee table she had to get as far away from him as possible. She picks up all the supplies scattered all over the room. Her movements were frantic and Peter’s eyes never left her and she could scream. When she came back from the bathroom, where she had put the first aid kit back all the way in the very back of the cabinet, so she never needed to think about this night again, he’s still fixed on her. Finally she can’t take it anymore she  has  to say something to him now. 

“I-,” 

“I-,” 

They speak simultaneously and Michelle is infuriated. He couldn’t even let her speak.

“Sorry,” Peter mumbles  finally taking his eyes off of her. She feels like she can breathe again. She could say what she needed to. But now her mouth was dry and the words were lost somewhere in her swimming mind. So now they were just standing on opposite sides of the living room just staring at each other pathetically. “Earlier, when I said that I didn’t want to see you,” Peter pauses swallowing. “I didn’t mean it like that, like I didn’t want to see you.” 

“Well that’s weird because that’s exactly what you said,” Michelle can’t help the venomous tone her voice takes but she’s certainly not all that sorry for it. Peter heaves out a sigh taking the smallest step towards MJ but it feels like he’s suddenly leaped right to her. 

“I just,” He pauses again and Michelle wonders why it’s so difficult for him. But then she remembers what she did to him. “I knew you probably didn’t want to see me, because I know you hate me.” Michelle scoffs, she actually scoffs, the reaction is visceral, uncontrollable on her part. 

“Peter are you actually that naive?” Her words are harsh but she can’t find it in her to be sorry, well maybe that was a lie because somewhere down inside her she felt a stab as she watched Peter shrink in front of her. 

“I just thought that since the last time I saw you, you.” Again Michelle scoffs. 

” God Peter , do you know how much easier all of this would be if I  hated  you?” She’s officially fuming now. She turns away from him throwing her hands up to her forehead rubbing her temples a headache already brewing. She sighs before turning back to look at Peter. “Peter I didn’t break up with you because I suddenly stopped loving you,” She yells at him he visibly flinches. 

“So then why did you?” Peter’s angry now and he takes another step towards her.

“Because I wasn’t going to sit there and watch you destroy yourself for something that was never your fault in the first place!” Michelle has reached her tipping point all of the things she had been shoving down since Peter had gotten there. It was spilling out of her now like vomit and it actually tasted as bad. “Look Peter I know that after Tony died it was hard for you but you totally shut down you would go out every night and a nearly get yourself killed trying to prove something to someone that wasn’t even there anymore,” Her words hurt him she could tell. “Someone you never needed to prove yourself to in the first place, Tony knew what you could do, he trusted and believed in you but somewhere along the way you stopped caring about yourself and the people that cared about you and I couldn’t take it anymore,” Michelle’s throat was starting to get tight and her voice cracks as she goes on. “I couldn’t just sit there and watch you get yourself killed because you stopped believing what Tony  always  knew.” Her voice is soft now, tears brimming as looked at Peter. His breathing was shallow she could see it from here, his chest heaving, tears forming in his own eyes. “Peter it was too much for me.” She finishes looking down at the floor. She had never told him that, she should have told him that. 

“Em,” Peter chokes out, she looks up at him he’s right there now she could reach out and touch him now. “I know that for a while I stopped caring but I’m not that guy anymore,” Peter pauses looking for MJ’s reaction, her face is unreadable. 

“Peter those are just words,” Michelle sobs now her heart ached because she wanted to believe what he said, she wanted to believe that he really was the man that he was standing there claiming to be. 

“I know,” Peter reaches out but quickly retracts his hands. “A few weeks ago I got really badly injured and I didn’t have anyone to call I was lying on the ground in a dirty alley just waiting to be strong enough to move and all I could think about was how I was alone because I had been so stupid and careless with the people who gave a shit about me.” Peter’s voice crack and Michelle’s heart squeezes in her chest. “And I had no one to blame but myself,” Peter pauses taking in a breath. “I just wanted to say that I was sorry for how I treated you, especially in those last few months.” Peter apologizes and she can tell that he really meant it. “I just needed you know that I was sorry,” 

They stand there on opposite sides of the living room neither of them saying anything. They were in the eye of the storm, of course not literally the storm outside was still beating violently at her apartment window. Their own personal storm that had been swirling around them since Peter had crossed the threshold into her apartment was slowing around them. They stood a foot away from each other neither of them wanted to touch the silence that had fallen over them, MJ wondered when her apartment had gotten so warm. Peter’s eyes were glossed over looking back at MJ with an all too familiar look of desperation, she knew the pain he held there was reflected in her own gaze. Stray curls fell across his forehead MJ’s fingers twitching at her sides wanting to reach up and brush them out of his face. But she knew the ripple effect such a simple touch could cause. Both of them jump as another loud rumble of thunder crashes outside, lightning lighting up the mostly dark room. The only light in the room was coming from the tv that was still on mixed with the lightning outside drowned the room in blue casting frightening shadows across Peter’s already silhouetted face, fear stirred in the pit of her stomach. 

The more she stared at Peter the more she itched to reach forward and touch him. With another crack of thunder and flash of lightning MJ notices Peter drifting towards her, she finds her feet bolted the floor. She lets him get closer to her, his hand is brushing the one she has at her side, his fingers fumbling around hers, his hands are clammy and she’s brought back to the first time he had tried to hold her hand, a loud boom of thunder brings her crashing back into  this reality. Peter’s leg knocks into MJ’s she stumbles a little, Peter’s other hand coasts up her arm, slowing at her shoulder, then her neck, his thumb traces along her jawline sliding all the way up her cheek until his hand is placed firmly against her cheek. Instinctively she leans into his touch. All at once MJ feels protected but also like the world is beginning to crumble around her. Peter’s thumb grazes along MJ’s lower lip as the other hand moves to her face, his eyes were searching hers, looking for permission. MJ blinks back at him she wanted to feel his touch more than anything. She missed how he made her feel. 

Another bang of thunder and Peter rushes forward pressing his lips firmly to hers, instantly a sob falls from MJ’s lips, they stumble back a little until Peter has her pressed against the wall his lips were chapped and his kisses where feverish and rough but if she was being honest she didn’t give a shit. One of Peter’s hands falls down Michelle’s body coming to rest on her waist dragging her oversized t-shirt up above her hips leaving part of her torso exposed if it wasn’t for the heat of Peter’s hand she would have been cold. His other hand slips behind her neck keeping her in place. MJ’s hand travels to his face keeping him right where she wants him. Peter pins her to the wall using his hips, thunder once again crashes outside suddenly sobering MJ up, she considers pushing Peter away from her, telling him that they shouldn’t do this that he’s in a vulnerable place and it probably wouldn’t be a good idea, but she doesn’t because she needs his touch as much as he needed hers. So instead of saying anything she pulls lightly on the hairs at the nape of his neck and grinds her hips into his. MJ moans as the friction their hips moving together gives her exactly the feeling she wanted. A sigh falls from her lips, as Peter’s lips drag down her jaw to her neck. MJ’s hand trails down from Peter’s neck to the hem of his shirt swiftly pulling it up over his hand temporarily removing his lips from her body. As Michelle discards Peter’s shirt, Peter watches her hungrily. Both of their breathing is heavy and they take a moment staring at one another then Michelle presses her palms into Peter’s chest. His hands cover hers before his lips capture hers in a new kiss. MJ pushes Peter back, hands still on his chest, lips still attached. Peter’s knees hit the couch and he goes down lips parting from Michelle’s. She straddles him, knees on either side of him. She takes his face in her hands bringing him into her, his lips attach to her collarbone nipping lightly, his arms wrap around her back pressing her into him. He pauses for a second pulling back, Michelle looks down at him quizzically, he smiles up at her reaching for the hem of her shirt and pulling it up over her head leaving her completely exposed. Peter takes it in for a second and MJ smirks down at him reveling in something she had missed. 

“Are you just going to look, or are you going to touch?” MJ whispers teasingly she bites her lip looking down at Peter. Peter being the ever smart boy he is, chooses to touch. Peter reaches up cupping her breasts and expertly kneading them. Michelle throws her head back groaning while her hips instinctively grind into Peter’s. He lets out his own guttural moan, she tugs at the waistband of his sweatpants. She pushes herself up on her knees tugging at the pants with more force they eventually give and peter shimmies out of them leaving them both in only their underwear. Michelle runs her hands from his shoulders to down his arms until she can intertwine their fingers. MJ leans back a little tugging Peter up from the couch, her bare feet land gracefully on the floor while she uses their intertwined hands to lead him down the hall but Peter can’t wait until they get the few feet to her bedroom he slams her into the nearby wall the force causes their lips to break apart briefly. He brings their intertwined hands up over her head using one knee to spread her legs enough for him to fit in between them, he settles there, one knee between her legs the other on the outside keeping her pinned there. “Peter.” MJ bites Peter’s lips to get his attention. “The bedroom. Now.” She looks down at Peter whose eyes are searching her face hungrily his lips swollen. Peter doesn’t hesitate he grabs her by the back of the thighs hoisting her up so she can wrap her legs around his waist her arms wrap around his neck pulling him into her. She pulls with a little more force than she had intended too he stumbles a little and they nearly land on the floor, but luckily Peter had gotten them to the bed just as another crack of thunder sounds from outside. Their bare chests are pressed together as they move as one. Michelle hair falls over one shoulder and Peter gingerly moves it out of the way kissing her bare shoulder. 

The next morning MJ wakes up with Peter’s arms securely around her waist, her bare back pressed to his chest his face nuzzled into her neck. She can’t help the smile that spreads across her face. MJ turns herself around in his arms draping her arms around his neck. She brushes her nose against his softly and he stirs a small smile making its way to his still mostly asleep form. She kisses the tip of his nose, once, twice, three times and his eyes open to look at her. 

“Hey you,” Peter wraps his arms more firmly around her and she buries her face into his neck taking in his familiar scent. She had missed mornings like this more than she had thought she had but as much as she wanted to fall right back into things with Peter she was hesitant. “Hey, no, no please don’t look at me like that,” Peter’s face scrunches up with worry, she can see the fear in his eyes, it was the same fear she felt bubbling inside her. The fear of losing someone she could never bear to lose, it was easier to lose him when it had been her choice, when she knew the ache she felt was nothing compared to if she had lost him unwillingly. So now she had to choose again, and the choice was so much harder to make when he was looking at her like that. The ache of worry was nothing compared to the ache she felt without him around.

“P-please stay,” Michelle’s voice cracks as she pulls herself even closer to Peter, wrapping her arms around his back pressing her cheek to his chest. He squeezes her in return and she could feel his breathing catch and his body tense around her before relaxing and tilting his chin down to kiss the top of her head.

“I’m not going anywhere,” MJ lets out a shaky breath looking up at Peter from his chest, a steady stream of tears falling down her cheeks. Peter wipes her cheeks with his thumb. “I promise.” 


End file.
